Sunday, April 19, 2015

Creativity Matters. Especially to Me

It's hard to believe that the school year is drawing to a close, but here it is April 19th, and I'm finishing up lesson planning at the Cafe at the Overlook (I am a new fan).  Today was the first day in awhile that I've been able to devote a good chunk of time to planning.  Lately, I feel like I'm flying by the seat of my pants, as I'm trying to juggle writing a dissertation and being a teacher at the same time.  Honestly, I haven't done either one well.  Writing a dissertation is a full time job, and teaching is a profession that requires 45-50 hours a week to do well, and even then, it's not enough time.

So, in order to meet the demands of such rigorous endeavors, I've become the master of efficiency.  And it's killing my creativity.  I can't remember the last time I felt great about a lesson plan, designed a project that I was proud of, or wrote something remotely void of academia.  In short, I've become quite boring.  Even my choice of dress has become slightly drab because the last thing I feel like doing in the morning is thinking about what to wear, which is fine if you're someone who doesn't care about what you wear, but I do. There's something to be said about walking out of the house feeling confident.

There's also something to be said about a lesson plan that you feel confident about.  One that you have planned with the end of mind, one that is built on the knowledge you have of your students' backgrounds, one that is relevant and rigorous.  A dynamic lesson can make or break your day, and while they can be completely spontaneous, spontaneity doesn't happen frequently for me.  For me, a dynamic lesson takes time to plan.  It doesn't take loads of time, but it does require some time, and I haven't devoted nearly the amount of time to planning as I used to. Do I believe I'm still a good teacher?  Absolutely.  But I'm not at my best right now, and that's a hard pill to swallow. 

But I can be better, and that begins with sharpening my creativity.  It means making time for music, art, poetry, and beauty.  It means realizing that I'm at my best when I'm balanced and not spending all of my time reading academic journals.  It means taking pictures of the magnolia trees at Saint Mary's, a neat quote in a cafe bathroom, reading a recipe on Pinterest, looking at pretty clothes at Flourish, and listening to Dave and Jack on Pandora.

It means setting aside time to be free. Who's with me?

Don't think. Thinking is the enemy of creativity. It's self-conscious, and anything self-conscious is lousy.  You can't simply try to do things. You simply must do things.    - Ray Bradbury