Bright Spot

My morning and much of the day was horrific. I had no business even going to school for the two hours I was there. Turns out hydrocodone and I do not get along. Thankfully, my soon to be student teacher (in the spring) comes every Monday and Wednesday.  I let her lead class while I sat there until the sub came.  I assigned a culminating project on Monday so I gave my 1st hour time to work in class today since we had a shortened class period and I obviously was in no shape to do anything.

So I sat there and observed. I listened, I watched, and I smiled. Sometimes I wonder if my kids really get the essential questions, the enduring understandings, the themes, and the complexity of what I teach. One of the neat things about listening to them work was that I was listening to them think.  I explained to them on Monday that this is a performance based project, which means help from me would be limited.  I needed to assess what they had learned and could produce on their own.

I wish I would have taped what I saw because it was everything learning should be.  They were discussing themes with each other, their eyes got big when they had an aha moment, they used the tools I gave them, and they were putting the pieces together. It was beautiful.  It wasn't quiet, but it wasn't chaotic. It was the productive hum I've come to love. 

 It made me proud to be a teacher, and was a reminder from God that I'm doing His work. It was a good reminder :)

Epic Failure

I wanted to write this last night when it was fresh in my mind, but it was a long day and I didn't get home until late so keeping my eyes open was difficult.

I'm not sure I've ever had an entire day (until 5th hour) go completely wrong until yesterday.  However, it was a great teaching tool even if it made me want a huge do over button and a bottle of Moscato.

I was excited for first hour because I wanted to get my students going on edublogs, get rotations going, and get some much needed small group writing instruction. We only got through one station. ONE. Here's why: I assumed...even though I know everything wrong that can happen when we assume.  Assumptions: my students could set up a blog (title, username, etc.), my kids could figure out how to post a blog, my students knew how to blog (ie write!),  Here's what I learned: the word blog scared my kids: "I don't know how to blog Miss!!" What's a blog? I don't get it? What should my title be? There's no save button (yes, it's on the side...it says save), What color should it be?

Just typing all of that makes my head hurt. I was supposed to be working with my writing group, remember? Actually, in hindsight, my writing group functioned really well without me (one good thing!),

The bell rang, I felt frazzled, and I thought I would be able to regroup during my plan hour. I made the mistake of going in the office and was pulled into a meeting. I didn't get anything done, and rushed to get to third hour which keeps growing and growing and growing. This class is huge. I have football players who are HUGE, I have kids who are small but have big mouths, I have some kids that need to stand up because sitting down is a nightmare. Every seat is full and it is a difficult class to keep on task.  After a long third hour (the longest of the day) I was desperate for a reprieve. I needed to catch my breath. Two more class periods to go, though, so that wasn't happening.

Take aways from the day: Explain everything, even if it seems like something everyone would know. Assume nothing. Certain kids are not allowed to use the bathroom. ever. I need help with my third hour. I need to post more things in the room. I have A LOT of work to do to get better.

Sitting on the Dock of the...

I was supposed to have my wisdom teeth removed this morning, but alas, my stupid cold prevented me from getting this dreaded misery over with.  It was too late to go in to school, and I already called in so I decided that I would spend the day on the couch trying to get over this cold.  Bring on the Potent C, which I might add puts emergen-c to shame. Just sayin'.

I decided to review my notes in my Reflective Practice for Educators textbook in order to write up the formal PD calendar.  One of the items I highlighted, starred, and underlined was this statement: What is my role in this situation and what can I do to make a difference?

That statement is what I truly think accountability is all about.  Somehow, it has turned into test score data, which I can only blame on laziness because people do not want to take the energy to figure out how else to gauge student learning and teacher effectiveness in an "easy" way.  Interestingly enough, teachers, which I have begun to call practitioners, rarely get to use the easy way out.

What is my role in this situation? First, I guess I should figure out what the role is! My role is two-fold: making my students better readers and writers AND helping them to champion their future.  In other words, I want them to be the best people they can be. Challenge taken. I know and accept my role, but the question remains what can I do to make a difference?

I think reflective practice is essential to answering the preceding question, because it is not one that is easily answered.  I am a practitioner. I am well-versed in reading strategies and differentiated instruction jargon, but putting that into action with 30 some students in 70 minutes is anything but easy.  I do know that I need to help my students develop schema, to think abstractly about different concepts, and to chunk what I'm teaching.  I do not have the luxury of sending a novel home with many of my students and saying "good luck, and may the odds be ever in your favor".  For some of my students that's synonymous with sending a person who cannot swim into the ocean without a life jacket.  I simply cannot do that.  So for now, I will continue to plug away.  We will read Mango Street in class, we will Think-Pair-Share, we will write, we will explore, and hopefully we will grow.

Where do I begin?

You know the hardest part about reflecting? The part that sheds light on everything you could have done but did not realize you should have done until the end of the day.

I don't like starting the day with an honors class because for the most part they "get it".  I don't have to be so explicit when I give directions and that sets a bad tone for the rest of the day.  I forget all the extra things I should do when explaining a more abstract concept and then scratch my head wondering why some didn't get it. Then a light bulb goes off around 4th hour and I realize that I need to use way more examples when I'm teaching and that while modeling is good, I need to think aloud my thought process more.  It isn't that my other classes aren't capable of doing great work.  Many of them will! I just have to do a better job of explaining some subtle things that I take for granted in my 1st hour class. The first step is catching the problem.  The second is finding new ways to explain concepts. The third? Actually doing it.

I have a lot to think about, but this is a reflective practice blog, so I guess that's good!